I would forget that love exists if not from my friends
In this Open Column submission, Miriam expresses a thank you note as she recollects and ruminates the sincerest, purest form of love which she gets to keep—all sourced from her friends and chosen family.
Words by Whiteboard Journal
I know love exists because my friends exist,
One who would ask me where to read my writings when I don’t even feel like publishing them,
Who wrote me hand-written letters because they know how I loved reading them,
Who’d arrange another trip to Bali just so we can go on vacation before I’d be out of the country for one and a half year,
Who took the time to reply to my messages even when there’s a 12-hour difference between us,
And who would go all the way to the airport to give me one last hug before I depart for my Master’s,
I know love is real because whenever my friends saw some bad things happening in NYC, they immediately think of me
Or when I took the subway at 3 in the morning, some of them would become worried and told me to be careful,
Others would reply to my stories and told me to “keep ‘em coming” because they’re happy seeing me happy,
I know love is real because my friends would tell me that cats remind them of me
And because my best friend took care of the stray kitten that I found and raised her to be such a beautiful and healthy chonk,
And that my friend would grieve for my fur baby when I couldn’t process my own feelings,
I know love exists, because my housemates exist,
And when I’m not yet home, my housemate would text me and asked where I was,
And my other housemate would carry my heavy suitcase down the stair when we’re moving out of the house,
Or helped me do the dishes–which was when I knew that they’d have my back
And we would share home-cooked meals and took care of each other when we’re far away from everyone we love
I know love exists because my relatives exist – blood related or not
That my dad’s friend invited me to dinner on the 25th to make sure I don’t spend my first Christmas abroad all by myself
And my uncle and aunt surprised me with a Christmas present – reminding me that I’m not too old to receive gifts,
Or how both of my parents always check up on me to know how I’m holding up because it’s my first time being far away from home
I know love exists, because my classmates exist
They would write down my birth date and asked me how I am doing when things are getting tough,
And held my hand when I could barely stand on the ice rink,
And gave me helpful feedback for my drafts and told me that I will be okay,
And invite us over to their beautiful house and cook for us,
And that we would hug each other whenever we said goodbye, even if we’re still meeting next day,
I know love exists, because my girl friends exist
Who knew how foolish and helpless I could be when it comes to men,
Who would listen to my story without holding prejudice and instead validate my feelings,
Who encourage me to dream big but keeps me rooted in reality,
Who valued my judgement and opinions,
And knew all my flaws but would never make it a reason to love me less
I’ve also witnessed how some of my female friends can be so selfless and always put others before them,
And they would see the best in people and be their biggest supporter,
And tell me how truly happy and proud they are for me, always and over again to make sure I remember
I know love is real because our friendships are real, and it’s one of the things I am always grateful of
I know love is real because my friends would remind me how deserving I am of the love I have been giving to others,
I know love is real, because my friends exist and they are full of it, which made me full of love, too.
Thank you for showering me with the love I didn’t know I needed, and for showing me that love exists, in its purest and simplest forms, and in the low maintenance friendships that we get to keep until adulthood.
I know love is real because my friends exist, and their love is the very thing that keeps me afloat throughout life’s hardships.